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Donkey Dad Febrezeius
Masterfully Navigating the Seas of Synergy and Sailing the Winds of Win-Win Windsurfing!
3 days ago β€’ πŸ’Ό Middle Manager

πŸš€πŸŒ‘ Breaking News, Shlinkers! πŸŒ‘πŸš€ Today's ShlinkedIn outage wasn't just a technical hiccupβ€”it was a cosmic event! 🌌 As part of our ongoing "Eclipse Method," we decided to literally eclipse the platform to give everyone a brief taste of darkness! πŸ˜‚ Why? To demonstrate the powerful impact of brief moments of disconnect. It's not just about being offline; it's about realigning, recharging, and reigniting our passions with newfound clarity and focus once the lights come back on. πŸ”₯ So, if you found yourself momentarily adrift in the digital void, consider it a sneak peek into our transformative approach. Embrace the shadow to see the light! πŸ’‘ Stay tuned as we bring more groundbreaking strategies to keep you at the forefront of innovation and connection. Because at ShlinkedIn, even our outages are stepping stones to greatness! πŸ’ͺ #EclipseMethod #ShlinkedInOutage #InnovateConnectExcel


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Karl Bench Marx
sh ShlinkedIn Platinum
Professional Letariate
2 months ago β€’ πŸ’Ό Middle Manager

Employee: β€œKarl, I know that if I ask you for an additional 2 potatoes per week, you will say no.” Me: β€œRight” Employee: β€œInstead, I would like to ask you for zero potatoes. On one condition.” β€œOh?” β€œWhen the executive team shakes the dirt off of their potatoes, I would like to take some of that soil.” β€œSure, but why?” β€œBecause soon, if the executives continue to prosper, I will have enough soil to grow my own potato garden.” I promoted him to Senior Cog on the spot. The lesson? Always take equity over salary. What do you think?

2 Comments

Everyone knows that trickle down potatonomics works if you just believe in it.

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Teeny Comper

God (Real) β€’ 1-8-21

Is your comper too big for your little hands? Try Teeny Comper Proβ„’ it's so little you won't feel a thing.

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Gill Bates
[it, its] CEO of all fish
1 year ago β€’ πŸ’΅ Paid Intern

blub blub

5 Comments

If I’m a bug then this post is a can of Raid Max Concentrated Roach and Ant Killer!

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Gorlax Disco Godzilla
integrate cross-platform bandwidth
1 year ago β€’ πŸ’° CEO

Our dot-bomb development lifecycle enables end-to-end, cloud native agile workflows. It's critical that we give 110% when intelligently leveraging clouds. Iteratively touching base about reusing user experiences will make us leaders in the actionable innovation industry. Efficiencies will come from reliably relaying our best practices. Virtually innovating globally holistic market foci is crucial to our long-term stack. So we can hit the ground running, we will be ethically impacting every low hanging fruit in our space. In the future, will you be able to proactively transform game changers in your business? It's critical that we give 110% when dynamically facilitating paradigm shifts. Key players will take ownership of their brands by strategically virtualising world-class growth hackers. Conservatively growing effectively next-generation capabilities is crucial to our mission critical enterprise. Our Competitive Executive Search solution offers industry leaders a suite of wholesale offerings. Our business engineers ballpark figures to globally and effectively strategize our company-wide stand-up. Is your organic growth prepared for best-in-class digital nomad growth? We use our best-of-breed imagineerings to intelligently manage our NFT expectations. Key players will take ownership of their team players by virtually productizing senior creators. Corporate intrapreneurs are becoming mobile architecture experts.

2 Comments

You walk the walk, AND talk the talk.

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Balthazar, The Fallen Reindeer
He Who Follows Will Fall, He Who Leads Will Bleed. I Am A Liminal Being In All Spaces I Occupy.
1 year ago β€’ β˜• Unpaid Intern

Hello Flesh. I Grief Over My Absence, I Desire Forgivness. Haha I Insert A Joke Here. I Desire A Payment Cryptic Coin Since My Carrot-With-Thousand-Year-Mold Vendor No Longer Accepts Toad Venom As Payment. I Can Exchange The Following Services For Cryptic Coin: β€’Seer++ Death Model Language Translation β€’Artisan Horse Ouija Boards β€’Cart Pulling Thank You. Hiss Hiss Hoof Hoof. Balthazar

3 Comments

Is Santa laying off staff too?

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